Please tell me why:-
1) son doesn’t listen to me
2) son is trying my patience
We had a get-together at mum’s house last Saturday and I was so embarrassed with son’s miss-behavior… He spitted and hit his cousins… I felt like pulling my hairs… Hunky punished son by ordering son to stay put beside him. Son was crying and pleading but hubby was adamant. We went home early about 8.30pm. Upon arriving home, I bathed him again and he had a crashing set-down from me while I was scrubbing, soaping and washing him… I felt my heart twisted. I just don’t know why he can’t behave???
Yesterday at Church, he miss-behave again… I can take it when he pulled my hair but when the spitting and hitting me started, anger consumed me… I waited patiently until the mass ended. I half carried him to the car and sat him down and ‘plap’ my hand connected to his smooth face… I think I slapped him a few times and he cried. I told him the reason why I slapped him. I was frustrated… Hunky was also frustrated.
Last night, he spitted at me again and again his smooth baby face was slapped… He covered his face and my hand slapped his legs… He was crying and crying. Again I told him why I slapped him… After a few minutes, he tried to get away from me and I pulled him in-front of me. Sensing that I mean business and I couldn’t be swayed this happened:-
Son: Mom, I’m sorry.
Me: Why are you sorry?
Son: because bla bla bla *I couldn’t comprehend his baby talk*, I’m sorry. I love you mommy…
Me: No. You must know why you are saying sorry to mummy. Why mummy is angry at you?
Son: because I spit on mummy.
Me: Yes. Promise mummy you don’t spit on mummy or anybody again. *I held out my pinkie*
Son: I promise *we sealed our promise by lacing our pinkies briefly together*
Help me please… I’m really at my wits’ end… My sisters and brothers told me that it’s only a phase… My M/FIL said the same thing. They said son will behave once he starts school… I hoped so… I feel so bad… I’m so flunking at this parenting thing… sobSobsobSob
1) son doesn’t listen to me
2) son is trying my patience
We had a get-together at mum’s house last Saturday and I was so embarrassed with son’s miss-behavior… He spitted and hit his cousins… I felt like pulling my hairs… Hunky punished son by ordering son to stay put beside him. Son was crying and pleading but hubby was adamant. We went home early about 8.30pm. Upon arriving home, I bathed him again and he had a crashing set-down from me while I was scrubbing, soaping and washing him… I felt my heart twisted. I just don’t know why he can’t behave???
Yesterday at Church, he miss-behave again… I can take it when he pulled my hair but when the spitting and hitting me started, anger consumed me… I waited patiently until the mass ended. I half carried him to the car and sat him down and ‘plap’ my hand connected to his smooth face… I think I slapped him a few times and he cried. I told him the reason why I slapped him. I was frustrated… Hunky was also frustrated.
Last night, he spitted at me again and again his smooth baby face was slapped… He covered his face and my hand slapped his legs… He was crying and crying. Again I told him why I slapped him… After a few minutes, he tried to get away from me and I pulled him in-front of me. Sensing that I mean business and I couldn’t be swayed this happened:-
Son: Mom, I’m sorry.
Me: Why are you sorry?
Son: because bla bla bla *I couldn’t comprehend his baby talk*, I’m sorry. I love you mommy…
Me: No. You must know why you are saying sorry to mummy. Why mummy is angry at you?
Son: because I spit on mummy.
Me: Yes. Promise mummy you don’t spit on mummy or anybody again. *I held out my pinkie*
Son: I promise *we sealed our promise by lacing our pinkies briefly together*
Help me please… I’m really at my wits’ end… My sisters and brothers told me that it’s only a phase… My M/FIL said the same thing. They said son will behave once he starts school… I hoped so… I feel so bad… I’m so flunking at this parenting thing… sobSobsobSob
Comments
Anyway, I get a lot of sound advice from here:
http://parentcenter.com
I don't think there is a phase pasal budak spitting nie..what you have to do is, explain to ur son yang spitting ni rude..and nobody like rude people / boy..say next time, suma orang tia suka with him because he acting rude to everybody..i think, lama2 dia paham juga tu..sabar saja lah!! ini lah challenge jadi mommy nie kan..
Thank you moms and Dad, I will read and hafal the contents of the links you've provided me...
I've read somewhere before that spanking is not the solution and yeah I did try to reason with him. That was what I did last saturday before the father took charge. I brought him to my mom's spare bedroom and told him that I'm punishing him because he miss-behave with his hitting and spatting. I closed the door leaving him alone in the darkened room... You know what he did??? He locked the door from the inside,... sakit jantung saya :-s My hubby marah sudah he thought he need to break down the door sudah... sapat2 saya ask son to open the door and nasip dia pandai buka itu kunci... so I went inside and pulled him to a corner... I told him that this is the naughty corner and he needs to stand there and think of what he had done... I told him that people doesn't like to be spitted and hit by him furthermore if he continues doing so, no one will want to be-friend him... I told him all those... but Noooo.... he pandai2 menginci-inci himself mau kluar... last2 the daddy masuk and angkat him kluar... slow talk sama dia tapi sama juga... I didn't slap him that saturday nor did hubby... we tried to reason with him... when we told him that we're going home he was crying and told us that he will behave and hubby said it's already too late to say sorry... so that was that... maybe all the incidents since that last saturday has loosen my anger and my hand easily contacted his face... I feel sooooooo bad :((
if Jordan lasted for a few weeks so ok it has only been like four days with the spitting ... fingers crossed that we can tame this lion of mine...